A few years ago, I saw some striking photos of Guilin, China, while perusing an in-flight magazine and I immediately added it to my destination wish list. This past weekend, that wish was granted as we explored a much more rural and incredibly scenic area of China.
It's a magical city surrounded by a picturesque winding river and tons of steep, lush green mountains. (The topography is referred to as "karst" in this case.) I've never seen a natural landscape quite like it. We knew in advance that March is the rainy/cloudy season, but we figured: (1) Maybe there will be slightly fewer tourists and (2) It's just rain! So, two weeks ago, we booked some last-minute flights and then scurried to plan our activities.
Planning trips like this without using a tour agency or guide is always a little tricky and there's some level - I'd say 30% - of total guessing/hoping that you selected the right thing and don't get horribly ripped off! I find the logistics planning challenging because Google Maps (and all Google for that matter, which is basically EVERYTHING useful I know of on the internet!) is blocked in China along with many other tech options. Even the Apple Map App doesn't pull the right information or have common points of interest appropriately represented. Without good online mapping options, planning out walking route and distances between sites is a lot more guesswork. For most of the major sites or activities, I've also found that either the websites are not in English or have some pretty faulty translations. If the site is in English, some tour company is usually up-selling you and taking a cut. So, I did my best tossing an itinerary together. I found a driver named Jerry on Trip Adviser for our driving needs - we met over text and made a plan. Then, off we went, on the one-hour plane ride, the shortest flight any of us has been on in ages!
On Friday, we arrived at the hotel to find a huge green space out back as well as a farm complete with a pig, peacocks, and even an ostrich in it. Wild animals, and even open green space for that matter, are both pretty foreign to our kids at the moment, so they thought the hotel grounds were the highlight of the trip! I shouldn't make fun of them however, because I think the highlight for Nate and me was that the hotel's mascot was the hallucinated penguin from
Billy Madison. (Am I right?!) He joined the Tai Chi sessions each morning and I'm not entirely sure how one can focus on their Tai Chi motions when a drunk penguin is running around the platform, but it sure was a great scene to watch from breakfast!
On Saturday, we did the activity every tourist does - the four hour boat ride down the Li River which snakes back and forth through the karst mountains and then lets you off in a town called Yangshuo. There are a few websites describing the bits and pieces about these boat operators. From what I could make out, there was a 3-star boat option which looked like it had actually sunk in the river a few times and been pulled back out. This option seemed to be insanely crowded and even the actual boat operator's website recommended you pack your own food because the buffet provided would "not meet expectations." The 4.5-star boat looked pretty swanky and likely had never sunk before, but this came at a swanky price tag, so we opted for the 4-star boat which turned out to be perfect for us.
It was a misty, mysterious day weather-wise, which was actually quite beautiful in the mountains. When the boat docked in Yangshuo, we made our way through some tourist chaos and heavy cigarette smoke onto the "real" West Street. I had scanned a few partially correct maps ahead of time to find that there were multiple West Streets, but luckily, finding the real one turned out to be pretty easy. While exploring the actual West Street, we found it ranged from beautiful artisan shops with local items being handcrafted onsite to kitsch souvenir shops with panda everything and lots of little plastic toys. The souvenir shop owners play a dangerous little game where they hand an appealing toy to children and then parents are faced with either taking the item away and making their kid cry, or just paying for the silly item and avoiding the drama. One such scenario happened when a shopkeeper handed Monroe a stuffed panda, which of course, she LOVED. I told the shopkeeper, no, we would not buy it. Meanwhile, Monroe had already jetted off down the street with it. So, the shopkeeper whipped out his calculator and typed in some astronomical amount of money. I grabbed the calculator and typed in a much more appropriate number, to which he replied, "no, no, no," while shaking his hand at me. He typed in a slightly less insane price. I turned to see Monroe had now actually been throwing the panda up in the air and then gave it a street bath by soaking it in a dirty puddle and then laughing her head off. I angled my body in attempt to hide what was happening behind me and then just handed the shopkeeper the original amount of money I typed into his calculator and said, "Great, well, thanks so much!" As I walked away, he stared at the money and said, "okay, okay, okay." So, we now own a dirty little stuffed panda.
We really enjoyed exploring the local tea sets made by a guy who lived above his shop with his family and even purchased a beautiful one to bring back home. I love tea sets, but am not really a tea person, so I'll probably just drink tawny out of it, which I'm pretty excited about. Then Nate went into a comb shop where they were sanding and making combs out of various animal horns. He spent an extraordinary amount of time in this shop asking questions. I learned two things about my husband of nearly 12 years during the time - first, that he had an affinity for water buffalo (who knew?) and secondly, that he uses a comb every morning. I honestly did not know this as most mornings I am scurrying to fetch whatever items Monroe has thrown into the toilet as we both get ready for the day. When I questioned Nate on his comb usage, he looked at me like I was crazy and said, "Yeah, how do you think my hair looks this good?!" I guess I thought it was the "level 7 hold" gel in the purple container he always asks me to buy...apparently not! In any case, he now owns a comb made from a water buffalo horn. I give it about three days before Monroe throws it in the toilet.
On the drive back, we stopped at an area where you can climb stairs up one of the mountains (at home in Hong Kong, this is just called "Tuesday") for a jaw-dropping view of the river running through the mountains. About half way down the mountain, there were two toilets, typical in rural areas, so really just holes in the ground you stand over to pee in. Occasionally, if you are somewhere fancy, toilet paper is even provided. This was not "somewhere fancy." Despite the countless bribes and promise of rewards, after seeing (and smelling) these toilets, Isla informed us she would rather just pee in her pants and change them later than use these toilets. This was probably a wise move - every time I attempt to use these toilets, I end up with pee all over my pants anyway. Why not just cut out the middle man and pee right on your pants? So, we carried Isla down the mountain, she eventually peed her pants, and then we changed her pants, panties AND socks in the back of the car on the way back to the hotel.
On Sunday, my new driver friend, Jerry, picked us up to take us to the major local sites. We went to a massive cave called Reed Flute, which was very impressive, but I must say that it felt like a far cry from being in nature as they put colorful glowing signs all over the place telling you what every rock formation looked like (i.e. - A lion's head, a dragon's head, a bouquet of flowers, etc...and repeat). They even projected a short movie on the ceiling of the cave. I thought it was a bit much, but the kids loved it and I'm really glad they had an enjoyable first caving experience as we'll certainly be taking them in more caves one day soon. Next, we checked out the downtown area which has four connected lakes with beautiful bridges and walkways. Jerry informed us that the bridges across the river were designed to twist right and then left, back and forth the whole time because it is believed that ghosts / spirits can only travel in straight passages, so the bridges are meant to trap the spirits from getting across the lake.
The best part of the day had to be lunch. Jerry asked if we would be more comfortable with Western cuisine. We told him, no, please take us somewhere completely local. He said he would take us to a local place named after "the Tom Hanks movie." Nate and I figured he must not understand what we were asking and hoped that there wasn't actually a chain Bubba Gump restaurant around the corner (although I do love a good shrimp po'boy!) Jerry came through though as he dropped us off at our restaurant. It was, in fact, 100% local, but it did have the English name, "Forest Gump" thrown on the awning for good measure. There was no English on the menu, so we were very grateful for some pictures provided.
We ordered a veggie dish, something we thought had shrimp, and what I thought was obviously a chicken dish. It wasn't chicken though. It was so much better! It was deep friend taro with sticky sweet sauce on it, which tasted like the best treat one could ever find at a carnival! Nate nailed it with the shrimp dish selection as they came out deveined and beheaded. (Is that the correct culinary term? I think yes.) Getting shrimp without heads in China is pretty rare so between that and the surprise carnival delight, we felt like we hit the Forest Gump lunch Jackpot!
We rounded out Sunday with a night boat ride on the lakes. It was our family along with a large tour group. We glided across the lakes listing to the tour group clapping along and swaying to Auld Lang Syne which was being played on a Chinese instrument that resembled a sideways harp. The kids were exhausted but slaphappy, and it felt like a special end to our Guilin adventure.
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